Last night B called me a sex addict...so I fucked him.

Okay, okay. What he actually said was, "you have a sexually addictive personality," which is the same as saying, "in a different situation, you have a high probability of being a sex addict."

Anyway, if I had a slew of great one-liners like that, I'd go the stand-up comic route. I'm not entirely certain I have the charisma for it, but at least I have a good excuse for making up irreverent jokes.