I know I said that my next entry would involve information about how wonderful my roommates are, but this has been put on hold in favor of something else which really grinds my organ.

In a bad way. Oh fuck you, metaphors.

I'm single. Some people I know seem to think that this is an incredibly bad thing. Thus, in an attempt to get me some dick, they have sucessfully annoyed me beyond mortal comprehension. My friend, S, has tried to get me to hook up with one of her good friends, encouraged my hooking up with one of our mutual friends, and has, on more than one occasion, gotten phone numbers from guys with the intent of giving them to me. I have politely declined all offers. I am not interested in being set up with someone. The people I get to know, I do so because I want the interaction with them.

My roommate has also attempted to set me up with a friend of his, to very much no avail.

I am constantly told to not be so uptight about sex and dating, but I have certain issues with my body that hinder me from sharing it with anyone but those I utterly trust. I am not a very sexual person to begin with. I do not masturbate very often at all. I do not have sexual fantasies. This isn't to say that, when I care about someone, I won't have sex with him (or even her) as often as possible. I did with M before our relationship started to really go downhill. I enjoy having sex, but what I really enjoy more is the intimacy of it. M's and my intimacy died.

There is a boy I know who is very persistant about getting me to date him. He's exceedingly cute and a delightful flirt and I find him somewhat physically attractive otherwise. I do not want to date or be in a relationship with him for a number of reasons that may or may not be incredibly petty. First, he is a Christian. I am an Atheist. You do the math there. Second, he is younger than I am. Only by a year. But still. Third, I do not think he is very smart. One opinion I cling to is that one of the best ways to find out if someone is intelligent or not is to speak to them textually via the internet. He and I have spoken in text and this is actually the major reason I want to run and hide from him. There seems to be nothing of particular interest to me there. I don't hate him, and I don't want to be cruel, but I need someone more adult and more challenging than that. I am not looking for a fling. If I enter into another relationship, it is going to be as long-term as we can make it.

Finally, the truest reason I can think of for not giving this boy so much as a chance is I am holding out for someone I know only through the internet and a handful of telephone conversations. Think what you will, but I suspect something excellent might be there, and I don't want to commit myself to someone less worthy in every way but distance and miss it.

S called me up to my place of employ because the boy was there. She neglected to offer up that information. He asked me out and, as is customary, I declined. It was devious on both their parts. Also devious was the way he got my phone number today. And even more devious are all the comments about me perhaps not liking him and him going out to eat alone tonight. Guilt trips, while effective in that they cause guilt, are ineffective for getting me to do what you want, so don't pull that shit with me.

I keep thinking about how much I'd like to be with MC (mentioned in a previous entry), but as often as I think that, I also think about what a nightmare long-distance relationships are and how it's probably not the best idea for me to enter into another one.

He told me he considers us sort of half-together, and went on to say that he would probably ignore the advances of another woman.

So. Does that make us in a long-distance relationship already or what?

That's a rhetorical question.