Tonight I saw a movie with four men, my roommate and his friends. I was the only girl.

Overall I prefer males to females. I have even gone so far as to say I hate other women. This is unlikely to be true. I simply have a difficult time understanding why many of them allow trivial issues to consume their lives.

Over the years, I've had a lot of female best friends. When I was very young, I knew a girl named Kayla. She moved. Then I was friends with a girl named Shea. Then Lindsay, then Jennifer, then Bobbie, then P, then D. After her came K, and now S.

I have no idea where most of those girls are now. Most of the friendships melted away as we grew older and entertained differing interests, my own usually not relating in any way to the average.

I am a little bit weird, but as I grow older, I see it affecting my ability to make friends less and less.

Still, I have difficulty in social situations involving the same or opposite sex. When I spend time with many females, I am physically at ease but emotionally or mentally on edge. When I am with males I find myself less comfortable physically, but I find it easier to relate to the mentality of the group.

I haven't entertained a resolution to this problem. I'm really just musing about it.

We saw Clerks II. It was an utter delight and has my seal of approval.

In other news, I slept for thirteen hours last night. I dreamed about interacting in some way with most of the men I know or have met. It was rather like a series of skits in which we all had incredibly irrelevant conversations and I thought about what it might be like to have a penis and then hoped none of them were reading my mind.

My dreams are becoming increasingly more and more like real life. I remember a time when they were beautiful, fantastic landscapes of alien color and sound. I remember a time when my subconscious wasn't always on this plane.

I wonder if that was childhood.