[20:55] MC: We used to be such good friends dear ______, whatever happened?
[20:55] me: i quit the internet, mostly
[20:55] MC: Oh, that would do it
[20:55] MC: You used to be addicted to the internet
[20:55] me: i'm here like a couple hours a week on average
[20:56] MC: I guess a boyfriend would make me quit the internet
[20:56] MC: Let me rephrase that
[20:56] MC: A girlfriend
[20:56] me: but you'd be gay
[20:56] me: yeah. that.
[20:56] MC: Right
[20:56] MC: I'm not gay
[20:56] MC: I masturbate to pictures of naked women
[20:56] me: with horses?
[20:57] MC: No. Thats gross. If I did that I'd probably laugh, then feel scarred
[20:57] me: oh. okay.
[20:57] me: good to know
[20:57] MC: Then think about it way more deeply than any one person should
[20:57] me: it's just the massive dong of a most noble beast
[20:57] me: poor creature, unethically molested
[20:58] MC: It's very true. It has no idea whats going on.
[20:58] me: "ooh, procreation," it thinks, if it thinks
[20:58] MC: Yeah
[20:58] me: i wish that horse sex resulted in centaurs
[20:58] MC: Meanwhile the girl is thinking "MY FUCKING GOD I"M BEING SPLIT IN TWO", and some
[20:58] MC: YES
[20:58] MC: I'd fuck an eagle for a winged kid
[20:58] me: that is sooo wrong.
[20:58] MC: What?
[20:58] MC: How awesome would it be to have wings
[20:59] me: man it would suck if the kid came out with a bird body and man arms
[20:59] me: or a man body and a horse head
[20:59] MC: Yeah
[20:59] MC: Would it still be a centaur?
[21:00] me: no. i don't think so
[21:00] me: i think it would be a circus freak
[21:00] MC: That too
[21:00] me: or like what if it had horse legs and a man torso and butt and a horse neck and a man head
[21:00] MC: That would just be funny
[21:01] me: and a long, flowing, blonde mane
[21:01] MC: Some emo chick would find him hot as shit
[21:01] me: emos dig horse cock
[21:01] MC: Then they'd live in some colonial house in new england
[21:02] MC: He'd work at a record store, she'd be an animal therapist
[21:02] me: animal rapist
[21:02] me: i don't think the semicentaur would be sentient
[21:02] me: it's just too fucked up to be able to think
[21:02] me: it's no moral contest for an emo to rape a critter
[21:02] MC: Yeah
[21:03] me: he could still sell records, though
[21:03] me: he could be trained, like a horse
[21:03] me: made to speak, like a parrot
[21:04] MC: Yeah
[21:04] MC: Like.
[21:04] MC: Whinny style
[21:04] me: he could have a set of phrases: "that'll be 16.99 please"
[21:04] me: "thank you for shopping here."
[21:04] me: "i need to go poop"
[21:04] MC: "The restrooms are in the back
[21:04] MC: "Yes, it is that big"
[21:04] me: eh heh heh heh
[21:05] me: working in a record store, emos would be all over him
[21:05] MC: This is why horseporn is bad
[21:05] MC: Oh totally
[21:05] MC: Emos flock to those places. Indie record store to be exact
[21:05] MC: Like big corporate shit, emos stay away from
[21:05] me: that's where you're wrong. horse porn is god's gift to the imagination
[21:06] me: see all the good that just came of it?
[21:06] MC: True
[21:06] MC: We invented a race, and a wonderful relationship
[21:06] me: it's like a fairy tale
[21:08] MC: It is
[21:08] MC: Emofairy tale
[21:08] MC: Grimm's Fairy Tales sounds emo, but isn't
[21:09] me: the emo fairy comes to prepubescent kids houses at night and leaves black eyeliner under their pillows in exchange for their unwanted backstreet boys cd's